Hannah Montana, Evolution, and the Pointlessness of Beauty

Disclaimer: This has nothing to do with Germany or being a foreigner, but if you read this anyway, congrats! You win a free iPod Nano!

I had a really deep conversation with my friend and fellow exchange student the other day. Maybe it was just the delicious glass(es) of Weißbier that made it sound so, but we pretty much found the meaning of life. Of course our findings were lost as our voices gradually stopped slurring and we could walk in a straight line, but little fragments just stuck to my brain like annoying pieces of last night's steak between your back teeth.

So this recap is probably not 100% accurate, but I will try my best to hit the important points and just fill in the rest. Think of it as the computer generated battles on Deadliest Warrior minus the fake doctor and BS calculations.

It began when my friend, whom for the time being I will dub Hannah Montana, asked me if I knew the meaning of life. This was a question I haven't mulled over in a while so I really didn't know how to answer.

"That's a complicated answer," I said, sipping my drink, "because there are actually 2 separate meanings of life for us humans."

"Oh?" Hannah Montana asked.

"You see, as animals our meaning of life is basically to survive and reproduce. That's what evolution is based on. Everything about us and other organisms is based on our need to live and carry on our species."

"Yeah, I took Biology," the popstar was dissatisfied with my answer. I could tell she wanted something more than a lecture on evolution. Charles Darwin pretty much figured that out for us. "We don't need to do anything but eat, sleep, and copulate. But we're humans. Why do we find the need to fall in love or paint pictures or put on makeup? What's the point of it all?"

I smiled because she pretty much answered her own question. I was trying to find the words to explain it but she had already done so.

"Exactly, Hannah Montana. That's exactly the point. We as humans are the only animals who can appreciate beauty. All art, literature, and music are homage to the unique ability given to us by nature.

Beavers don't make dams to show off their artistic talent, they make dams because they need them for shelter. Songbirds don't sing because it sounds pretty, they use it as communication and to find mates."

Hannah Montana nodded slowly in agreement as she downed the last of her second or third Weißbier. We sat in silence and pondered this for a few moments. The bar was empty, as it normally is on Sunday nights. No one spoke. The bartender, Hannah Montana, and I listened quietly to the sounds of the Top 40.

"So all art is pointless." The singer finally broke the silence, lifting her new glass and offering a toast. "Does that mean everything we do besides eating and having babies is pointless? Money is pointless? The government? Jesus?"

I shrugged and clinked my glass with hers. "Pretty much. But pointlessness isn't necessarily a bad thing. The way I see it, we're lucky to appreciate beauty."

"But how did we get here? How did we get from being naked and climbing trees to Van Gogh and Jersey Shore?"

"Well, what set us apart as humans was being able to manipulate tools and our environment to our advantage. With that, man's mind began to grow exponentially. When he got to a certain point, man kinda looked around and asked himself the same question we're discussing."

Twirling her blonde wig, Hannah Montana thought about this for a moment and nodded. "Yeah, and that's when he decided that he was put there by god. And then it just took from there."

"The end."

She shook her head, still dissatisfied. "But the first semester of World History has nothing to do with my question. Do we just make stuff up about destiny and the meaning of life because we can? Are we really running around in the dark, pretending that we have a purpose when all we were really meant to do was to survive make more of ourselves? What is our purpose as humans, with free thought and aesthetics and stuff like that?"

Again I shrugged. "In my opinion, we owe it to nature and the miraculous genetic mutation that kicked off the growing of our minds to appreciate our human abilities and use them to their full extent. It could have easily been cows that received the ability to manipulate, and we'd be all running around getting put into human burgers."

"So art and beauty are pointless, and our meaning of life is to appreciate them because we are lucky to be able to."

"Pretty much, Hannah Montana. Now let's pay the bill and get home."

being sad and stuff

I was actually in the middle of typing "An Introduction to Dina Juan, about 83 days late" when suddenly I just felt sad. I'm not upset about anything in particular. In fact, I had a really nice day today. I helped my host mother rake leaves, learned how our compost is made into fertilizer, and ate ice cream in a church that's older than the USA. It was unusually sunny despite the chilly weather and I felt really nice after a day of activity.

But I just feel sad.

I guess a lot of things have been building up. My high school had homecoming week a while back and it made me really miss everything in San Jose. Juniors did an amazing job with airband and my friends looked amazing all dolled up for the dance. I saw my grandpa for a couple seconds on Skype and could pretty much smell his familiar scent of Marlboro and manufactured airplane parts. I found myself comparing everything to California, which made me susceptible to cravings: the mild San Jose climate, my entire family sleeping in to about 1 PM,  pupusas, and singing spontaneous duets with my brother when we have nothing else to do.

They told us to expect homesickness and that crying would help us feel better, but I can't even bring myself up to that. I feel the tension you usually get in your chest when you're about to burst into to tears but I can't burst for some reason. I guess writing this and spitting out some thoughts made me feel better, with some help from my host mom's homemade apple sauce. But I'm still waiting for that huge, refreshing exchange student cry.

In which I don't really do anything or have anything to say but say stuff anyway

So I woke up today with a massive headache and decided to take a day off from school. It was nice to be able to sleep in - I normally wake up at 6:03 (an extra 3 minutes courtesy of the Snooze button) and have to rush to catch the 7:00 bus. I didn't really do much today except watch movies and drink tea, but I feel a lot better now. The weather was also unusually nice today, I went out for a short walk and was able to enjoy the scarce German sunshine. I'm looking out the window now and see a merciless-looking band of clouds but hopefully they enjoy the fluidity of traveling in Europe and bug France or the Netherlands or Bayern or something.

Currently my class is doing Praktikum - two weeks of work experience and no school - and I'm staying in school with the 9th grade. The past week has been very interesting and homework-less, and I've met some pretty cool people. When I ignore the fact that pretty much everyone is 2 years younger than I am and yet I still manage to be one of the shortest in the class, I've been enjoying my temporary situation.

It's definitely a different story with the 9th grade here than it is back in the US. There's none of that freshman/sophomore/junior/senior stuff because Gymnasium starts at the 5th grade, so the 9th graders don't seem as immature or different compared to the others. They're a little smaller than the 10th graders and still have traces of baby face, but since they've been going to the same school for 4 years there's not much of that awkward tension that comes with age-difference. Or maybe I just bend in at a whopping 1.58 meters. 

I don't really have a life-changing philosophical conclusion today, I just felt like updating whoever has the time/lust to read up on whatever it is I'm doing.

Also yes, I realized I used lust in that sentence. That was meant to represent how shit my English has gotten in the past few weeks. Keep in mind that I'm also currently taking Spanish in school, which means my poor little foreign brain has to take on 2 foreign languages. Pero no problemo, ich kann alles! At dito pa yung Tagalog ko. Maybe by the time I'm 20 I can learn Latin and befriend the Pope.